Nerdling Tales takes a mostly spoiler free look at cult classics mostly overlooked by the public, movies that failed so hard they won, and the “what in the hell were they thinking” flicks. Join her as she reminisces about what makes these movies so interesting and full of hopeful sequel potential, and yet the general movie going population tends to forget their existence.
Because why not take a look at the heavy metal, killer robot movie!
Released: September 14, 1990
Director: Richard Stanley
Writers: Steve MacManus, Kevin O’Neill, Richard Stanley, and Michael Fallon
Stars: Dylan McDermott, Stacey Travis, John Lynch, Iggy Pop, Carl McCoy, William Hootkins, Mark Northover, Paul McKenzie, Lemmy
Hardware is about a robot that will stop at nothing to kill the woman who used its head for a sculpture. Do you really need to know anything else cause that is an awesome premise? It is kind of an odd mix of Terminator, Alien, and a late 80’s heavy metal music video with a dash of government paranoia thrown in for the heck of it.
Mo (McDermott) is a grizzled veteran who buys a robot head from a junkyard scraper for his girlfriend, Jill (Travis), to use in her art. She loves it and works it into her latest sculpture. After a night of arguing about the government then making up, Mo gets a call from a friend who thinks the robot head is a part of the M.A.R.K. 13 program. Because of a bible verse, Mo thinks the M.A.R.K. 13 program is a government conspiracy to wipe out all of humanity and becomes worried about Jill’s safety. He tries to reach out and warn her, but it is too late. The robot reassembled itself with the parts from Jill’s other sculptures and wants to kill her.
This is not a movie to watch with the kiddies. There is a lot of violence and gore which almost garnered the post-apocalyptic horror flick an X-Rating until Miramax had the movie re-cut so it wouldn’t be lumped in with porn. It also has nothing new to say or offer in the end of the world genre. If you have seen Robocop or any of the Terminator movies, then you already know what’s what in this movie. What is great about Hardware is the punk, heavy metal feel. The current string of post-apocalypse movies is all sad and desolate in a way that appeals to the tween generations. I loved The Hunger Games as much as the next guy, but I miss the times where the future looked like a White Zombie music video and not an emo-I’m-THE-special-girl-who-will-save-the-world fantasy.
For those of you who have seen Hardware, what did you think of it? Was you face melted off by the sheer metalness of it? Let me know what you think in the comments section below and if you are going to talk about spoilers, please post a SPOILER warning for those who haven’t seen the movie yet.