Kieran’s surprise birthday party went about as badly as a surprise parties can go, but it is the next morning at school that gives everyone the worst kind of shock.
Spoilers for “Happy Birthday to Me”
“I just like to be someone else every once in a while.”
The morning of Kieran’s birthday is a tense one in the Wilcox house. Kieran catches Eli coming in after he spent the entire night doing who knows what. A warning to his cousin, “Lakewood’s a small town. People watch. They talk… I don’t know what you were doing, but I know you.” “And I know you.” Eli responds evenly. (What that heck is that all about?) Kieran is all sorts of worried because he has it pretty good in Lakewood and his family’s tricks are going to probably ruin it for him.
stalking Emma applying for a job at the Grindhouse Coffee Shop, Eli manipulates Emma into cancelling the intimate get together Kieran had planned for the two of them and throwing her boyfriend a surprise birthday party. He even offers to get the booze because according to his fake (I think) ID, Eli is 23 year old Anthony Giordano from Winston Salem, NC (I feel like that will be important later or else why focus on the ID for so long).
Later at the party while on hallucinogens (more on that in a bit), Kieran tells Emma about the neighbor dog Eli “borrowed” when they were kids that ended up dead. “He always takes it too far.” What happened to poor Fido?!?
Playing the Mayor Card
After plying Brook with coffee and talk about the Lady of the Lake Pageant, Mayor Maddox is not happy to hear Jake is possibly in Mexico with his family. The two had a deal and Jake has reneged on his promise to Quinn to fix whatever he was supposed to fix. Quinn goes to Sheriff Acosta and puts him on the case of finding the missing teen. Acosta points out that Jake is not necessarily missing and looking for a kid as a favor to the Mayor is not exactly in his job description. “I created your job description. And because I’m your friend, I hired you to come back to Lakewood and play savior. You’re welcome by the way” Quinn fires back. Seems to me like the Sheriff doesn’t have the best record and is trying to make up for it. The school administrator claims Jake sounding “just horrible” called himself in sick with strep throat because his parents are in Mexico and “there’s no way he’s not calling in sick to school.”
Dali, he is not
In a panic, Audrey buries the bloody corkscrew (left in her car by the killer after it was used to kill Eddie the desk clerk) in a shallow hole out in the woods (after wiping her prints off, of course). Bi-curious should have known better because it shows up in her bed with a phone call from her tormentor telling her “nice try.” More texts taunting her pops up on Audrey’s phone during study hall and she thinks it might be creepy Stavo (me just realizing he doesn’t go by Gus) sending them since he is watching her, Brook, and Emma talk. Brook tells the other girls Stavo is obsessed with the Lakewood Six. Audrey searches Stavo’s book bag after she pulls the fire alarm, making everyone evacuate and have to leave all their things behind. Drawings of the Lakewood Six with dead eyes along with a disturbing sketch of Emma with a knife going thru her head and blood everywhere are on Stavo’s tablet (don’t most people lock their phones and tablets?).
Audrey takes her suspicions to Noah and the virgin half of their team defends Stavo by using Jennifer Jason Leigh and Mark Walberg’s roles in Single White Female and Fear as examples of “brooding loners always [getting] a bad rap” because of those films. After the disaster party, Audrey tells the Sheriff about the drawings on his tablet. Acosta searches Stavo’s room and finds a Brandon James mask in a box on the desk.
Eli makes things super awkward with him and Emma while setting up for the party when he nearly kisses her. Brook questions Emma about it, but she only gives rambling answers about how she is with Kieran. (Not good when you can’t give a straight forward answer)
Kieran arrives and Stavo (who crashed the party) hands out shots of the super expensive bottle of tequila “Jake” left on Emma’s door step. Not long after, everyone is very sick and Stavo realizes they have all been dosed with Ayahuasca, a peyote like drug kids in New Mexico would go to the desert and trip on. All they can do is just ride it out in the house where everyone can be safe.
Brook notices fire in Stavo’s eyes as he promises to guide her thru the trip. As he gives her a foot rub, Brook envisions Jake sitting in the corner of her room voicing her all of her fears. She wants Stavo, but denies it because she is still not over Jake.
Audrey dreams of Rachel who still has the noose around her neck. Audrey apologizes claims responsibility for her former love’s death, but Rachel tells her to “relax and don’t be scared” then gives her a kiss. Only it isn’t Rachel Audrey is kissing, it is Noah. Zoey comes upon them and is awed by the glowy energy between the two best friends. The three of them start to make out.
Kieran just gets sleepy from the Ayahuasca, so Emma takes him up to her room to sleep it off and get away from Eli. Soon she hears sounds of a squealing pig and a little girl calling out her name wanting to show her something. As she follows the girl into the woods, a man’s voice echoes asking “Why is she so scared?” as Emma sees photos of herself at a young age. Thru the trees, a shadowy figure in the Brandon James mask and a knife starts to run towards Emma. At first, Emma closes her eyes and keeps repeating “this isn’t real, this isn’t happening,” but the killer keeps coming. As the killer bares down on her, Emma hightails back to the house and runs into her father. Kevin came looking for her in the woods because someone at the party saw her walk outside. Maggie hisses at him “Just in time to play the savior. How convenient.” (WTF?) He wanted to give Emma a photo of them when she was little and tell her he is leaving for rehab once again.
The Sheriff questions the kids about the party and the attack on Emma, but it is clear he doesn’t believe her. He asks if anyone else saw a person in the Brandon James mask, but all he gets is a no because everyone else was tripping balls. Audrey believes Emma and tries to come to her defense. Brook says that it is all the fault of the dosed tequila Jake sent them.
The next morning Emma looks to Kieran for support about what she saw, but he feels like she came back to town too soon. Emma thinks she needs to stay and get her life together. Eli is listens in on the conversation and endeavors to get back in good with Emma by telling her he believes her. Thankfully Emma sees right thru him.
Noah questions Audrey about the apology she gave him right before the smooching began, but Audrey is cagey with her excuses making Noah confused. He tries to ask Zoey out on a second date (sands Audrey this time), but Zoey senses something more with he and Audrey and doesn’t want to get in between.
Before the start of the Lady in the Lake assembly, Brook apologizes to Stavo for everything and thinks he was being a good guy to her while she was flipping out. Zoey and Brook are announced as two of the top five finalists for the pageant and take the stage. When the banner is unveiled, Brook gets covered in blood as Jake’s eviscerated body falls onto the stage at her feet. (Never where white in a horror movie or show kids, it is just begging for blood to get all over you)
The school is on lockdown as the police try to search for Jake’s killer and you know that is not going to end well. Someone has to meet their end by the end of the episode in order to keep the great momentum the show has created. But who are we going to say goodbye to next week?
- Emma – If she is killed off, it will be at the end of the season
- Audrey – Same
- Kieran – It might be about time for another one of the Lakewood Six to go and he is my best guess for who would be next of the group
- Noah – God I hope not
- Brook – I kinda doubt she is going to be killed off since she has way too many unresolved issues with Seth Palmer/Branson
- Zoey – It would be cruel to kill off another one of Noah’s love interest, but she really doesn’t seem long for this world. She is too nice and nice people are usually gutted in slasher films
- Eli – I doubt he is going to die this week, but I don’t see him making it thru to the end either. I also don’t think he is the killer. The show is trying too hard to make him shady and it is supposed to be the person you least expect
- Stavo – See what I wrote about Eli
- Haley – We haven’t heard from the sadistic prank girl in a couple of episodes, but what better way to torment Audrey than to kill someone she was seen threatening
- Maggie – I always have to include parents on the doomed list
- Kevin – I know he is supposed to be leaving, but see above
- Mayor Quinn Maddox – See Maggie
- Sheriff Acosta – Authority figures have to be on this list as well
- Miss Lang – See above
- Random Cop or Teacher – You know
- Random Student – I don’t think random killings are going to happen until the end, but it feels like it needs to be on the list
What did you think of last night’s episode of Scream? Were you shocked by the ending? Who do you think if next on the killer’s list? Let me know what you think in the comments section below.